I had a miscarriage in the summer of 1999. We weren't trying to have any more children, in fact had decided our family was complete, so the baby was a surprise, and we had barely adjusted to the idea of the pregnancy when we lost it.
We have since been blessed with another child, which helped a great deal with the healing, and in fact I don't think about it a lot anymore unless I am reminded (though I did just now realize that our child would be starting kindergarten next year had he or she lived).
The other night I was watching "The Cider House Rules," based on John Irving's book. One subplot is a doctor who runs an orphanage and does illegal abortions on the side because he feels it's better not to bring yet more unwanted children into the world.
Having lost a child who was not asked for but wanted nonetheless, suddenly it hit me what a terrible loss an abortion is, whether those involved know it or not. At last, my disagreement with abortion is no longer just a head thing, but a heart thing as well.